Gretch and I have discussed the concept of soul mates on various occasions. We decided after a long day today to go out for Thai tonight and discuss what happened with her friends who both made the decision to cheat last week. Both friends use the term soul mate to describe the relationship they have that is not with their husband. Of course G and I don't for an instant believe that either one is being rational in where they are at this point in these relationships. The grass is always greener fits better then anything.
G doesn't believe in a person having a soul mate. Actually, I can't really tell if she feels that way. I very much think that her Spanish girlfriend may have been the closest she has ever been to having a soul mate. Just listening to the stories about that time makes me cringe a little. I do not think that she has any left over feelings, but I do think that G was very much in love with this girl. They had so much in common, they were incredibly close and shared so much.
I tend to think that some people match better than others and maybe that is as far as I can go with it. We, as a couple, are so completely opposite, I find it difficult to think of us as soul mates. At dinner this evening I asked what would make us more likely to be soul mates. G did mention compatibly. We didn't take it much further with ourselves because I think it could be a touchy subject if one of us feels slighted. I think that might be me. It isn't worth getting into.
We love each other for who we are, we know that there are huge gaps in even understanding what the other person is about, but we have grown so much by experiencing what each other has to offer. Without G I would know so much less about the world and what it has to offer. G says I am home. There never was a reason to come home until I was there.
I guess that is enough. Another thing to to add to my "things to ponder" list.
Anyway, about her friends. Friend one asked her to be her alibi for the evening and G said no to lying. She told the friend that she would realize that she might be going and giving her name as the person she was going to be with, but G would not back her up if he called. She would have to just take the chance.
The friend called Saturday morning and told G she decided that she couldn't go through with the night knowing G's name would be attached. She didn't want to lose this friendship over this night. Wise choice, but we know she will continue to see him.
Friend two went ahead and spent the weekend with the guy. She has found her soul mate and will leave her husband. She had the nerve to show up with this guy at a mutual friend of G's. Our phone has been ringing off the hook because people want to know what is going on. G shut off her phone. This juvenile behavior is being carried out by people that are close to 50 if not 50 already. The friend and "soul mate" that is.
I remember what it is like when you first enter into a relationship with someone. It is total infatuation. Every moment is spent with them or thinking about them when they are not around. Life is wonderful, nothing can bring you down. You have yet to experience every day life and all the crisis filled events that meet you down that path. The honeymoon stage ends and then the real test begins. That's when you find out if you are truly loved. Soul mate not needed.