TMI on that last post.
I believe it's around six a.m. and I can't sleep. I can't turn off my mind when I should be sleeping. I'm getting a little neurotic lately. I don't do well with change, it makes me nervous. The basic thought of the moment is, are you freakin crazy, you quit your health insurance.
So last night we dumped our plans to go to dinner by ourselves. G didn't get the raise expected because this is some kind of training period made up by a delusional physicist that does nothing but write papers to be published while G does all the work.
I had called payroll to find out when my last paycheck would be and they told me I got it already. I almost fainted with panic. Thankfully, they realized I am on a twelve month schedule and it will be in August. It still makes me angry to know that these last two weeks I am working for free. If I were on a ten month plan the last check was yesterday. We are contracted to the fifteenth. Seems that everyone picks up the money on the other side of calendar in August when you have off but are still being paid. What about those of us who terminate our employement. G was really upset by that news. I do a lot of "on my own time" work for the place because it is part of servant leadership and so I can let it go. I have 4 paychecks left and that will take me to my moms check and then with the ten hours at work and watching the baby I will be making the same without skipping a beat.
So with that "everyone is screwing us" attitude, we decided to get our rent-a-kids for a fun evening out to dinner. Only the five year old was available and he was only willing to go to McDonald's, or Burger King.
Never, ever would G go to a place like that for dinner and "our" kid would not do anything fancy so I had them compromise on going to Chili's. We ended up having a great time and that is what counts.
I still believe that if we had children it would make us think less of the petty stuff in life. My best friend was running crazy last night taking kids her and there and getting ready for M.G's going away party today. She agrees that you have less time to think about little things when you are constantly in motion and busy. G and I can waste an afternoon on worrying over a broken laundry door.
We both feel something missing in our lives and we talk about what we could do and what we shouldn't, but we never really come to a conclusion.
This could be a long Saturday of togetherness. I am hoping for some positive energy. We really need a break here.