Wednesday, June 08, 2005

I talked to the kids the other morning about how we won't be watching tv this summer. I said that we all need to develop a passion for something and get involved in it. I worry about my mom a lot because since my father died she seems to have died inside. She just sits there and watches 24 hour news stations and it just kills me when I go and visit. I end up cleaning most of the time I am there and making it a half way decent place to be. Why can't she have something that excites her and makes life worth living.
I think about my passion to write a book. Something about love and hate and relationships, perhaps a little foreign and silly. Then there is the need to write my story. Perhaps just getting some counseling would be more affective. I think being stuck with some of my thoughts is not good. I can't discuss too much about my journey with G because I feel too uncomfortable about some of these intense situations. It is like discussing exes. You are not supposed to give too much detail. Maybe I just want to write and purge it all. It was an interesting two years. Some great times and some horrible. I looked back at some emails recently and realized I am starting to forget some of the people I met and some of the situations. I should of used journaling back then.

G is grilling up some chicken to go along with the famous vegetable salad.
I am trying to eat healthy. I wore a sleeveless shirt today and it just didn't look all that attractive. I had to go up in front of everyone today so that they could say goodbye and clap. I could do without the whole school staring, but such is life. Some teachers took me out to lunch today and
I received flowers and balloons from the after school program teachers.
Nothing left but the meetings and the exit interview before the 15th.


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