Yesterday afternoon was the setting for one of those defining moments that can come completely by surprise. I went to the other school and the kids were taking communion in the middle of the afternoon. I just stood there in the back watching and thinking about what most students were doing right about then. I felt good at the moment, thinking that this is how it should be, the kids were incredibly lucky to have a such a great learning environment with a positive influence.
Unfortunately, that moment was deceiving for me. Last night I dreamt about arriving at an extended family gathering and didn't fit in. I felt so uncomfortable and had the feeling that everyone knew I was uncomfortable. Then the dream shifted and I was at work. Same situation. Always holding back, not contributing enough to the conversation, etc..
The storm is always brewing.

Yesterday in a class of young students, I asked if anyone knew what George Washington helped write. One child who was sure of himself raised his hand and called out, "the constipation."
He was so serious with his answer that I charged ahead without so much as a smile. It went over most of the others heads, and the ones who caught it didn't have time to react. Guess I am getting good at redirecting.