Tuesday, March 08, 2005

So we were tested a little this week on our decision that I could take a year off of work and decide which direction I would go regarding a career. Sunday morning while G was out of town I opened the employment section of the paper and saw the exact position open that I was using as an excuse as to why I wouldn't easily find a job. A reference position in our city library is open. I was shocked to say the least. Of course these city jobs require you to reside where you work. We never thought a job in this small suburb would open.
Guess you should expect the unexpected.
I told G about the job and we had a discussion. G would go for it and not think twice. Twenty years with the city and your retirement is covered. However, we came to the decision that we are going to stick with my plan for the next year and review in a year. This is the last we are going to discuss the decision. I feel relief. I am hoping other people didn't see the job posting and tell me about it. Parents are really concerned about what I am doing and how hard I am trying. I feel a bit deceitful. Not that it is any different than it always has been.
I got my letter of recommendation today. It is good, but I am not sure it will pertain to the public sector. My skills are so eleven years ago. I will have to update somehow.
Most important right now is G passing the test in June. The class was difficult and the test has only a 30 percent pass rate. 400 hours of study is minimum as of last weekend. This is another reason our discussion about my job is off limits for now. G is extremely supportive, but the stress of talking about some issues is time consuming and counterproductive to any decisions we make. We have a plan and we are going to follow it. No second guessing, or asking what if.
G is out to dinner with the family discussing a family trip to Las Vegas.
This is another extremely stressful subject. We don't want to go, but it might be hard to get out of it. I am afraid they will think it is because I am going to be making less money this year and I am not pulling my weight. It really has to do with the trips we have booked for this next year. Spain, New Orleans twice, and New York. It is ridiculous that we would go one more place. It would be just as ridiculous if I was staying employed.
Speaking of New Orleans, we are leaving in a week and 4 days. Just a mini vacation before G leaves for Spain. I don't know how I am going to handle the Spain trip. I have only lived alone 4 months in my entire life.
This last weekend I slept with my cell phone in the bed. I walked the condo late at night thinking of murderers and such. So juvenile, I know.


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