Thursday, March 17, 2005

Been kind of busy getting used to my new schedule and its effect on how I basically run my life. Monday and Tuesday I don't even get home till after six. I have a hard time doing anything beyond getting ready for bed and being a veg in front of the television. My day starts at seven with the kids and so almost twelve hours after I leave the condo the day is about me. Wednesday is the day I am finished at 2:15, so yesterday I went out looking for some new clothes. Didn't find very much. I don't like all those spring color fashions. Pastel is so over played at this time of year. Yesterday the damn dog ate one of my shoes. I didn't know it was happening until it was too late to run the kids back to my house to get a new pair. I do not know what I would have done if it would have been in pieces. It looked a little torn, but whatever, not much I could do.
Two days until we leave for New Orleans. I am excited about it, but hate the fact that G is leaving for Spain after that. We were talking last night and I came off a little immature I suppose. G was saying how much I would be missed and it would be a difficult 10 days. I said I didn't feel like validating that at the moment. The promise of the trip to family members, the funding of two and a half people, and the timing of my spring break were what I wanted to think about. I think it is really more about being by myself. I was so good at that for the longest time. Actually up until three years ago, it was just myself and having someone around me day and night was a foreign concept. Now I am so used to not being alone.
I have to go visit my family next weekend for Easter. I do not look forward to that cold, snowy trip, nor the line of questioning about my future employment it will bring. I will also be thing about the wedding I am missing of a friend who taught me more about myself than I could figure out on my own. That really seems unfair, but the circumstances just don't work for me.
It will be an interesting couple of weeks. I will try to be less pessimistic.


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